Monday, 15 December 2008
It was an awesome jam-packed weekend full of my favorite things!! Dancing, Champagne, good company, swimming on the top of the world and sunrise on the beach and that was just one night! On Saturday after a brief comatose state on my couch for 30 minutes, I went through to Hout Bay for yet more cocktails! Followed by yet another brief stint in Long Street! Sunday was spent exploring Hout Bay – which I had no idea was so funky! I met some incredibly unusual people, spent too much money at the market, drank a bottle of Moet - which to my absolute dismay was slightly corked!
My drive to work this morning was also pretty surreal, a combination of the breathtaking views on the coastal road and still feeling somewhat high from lack of sleep!
But crash, bang, now I am in an office, white walls and bad coffee! Sitting next to a tiny girl who chews unbelievably loudly for her size! Here I am again, wondering how the hell I can I can inform this wee scrap of a girl that chewing then swallowing can be just as efficient without the accompanying soundtrack!
16th December – Day of Reconciliation – No work – Outstanding!
Friday, 12 December 2008
6 Random Things about me:
1) I drive really fast, I try to drive carefully but I am very impatient.
2) I can spend hours in water - bath, pool, the sea. I am at my happiest under water.
3) Not a day goes by when I am not saddened by what has happened to my great love affair. We are practically strangers passing in the night and when he is with me, he makes me feel as sexy as dry toast. The resentment is always there, lurking just below the surface…then there are the lies...
4) My biggest accomplishment this week was making Christmas biscuits with festive icing, I haven’t baked since I was a kid, unfortunately I still make the same mess.
5) I really love Christmas, one of my dreams is to have my own home, have fairy lights everywhere, become a domestic goddess and make an amazing meal for my family.
6) My greatest blessing this year was starting yoga – I love how it has changed my body, I love feeling stronger and more fit. I love that for an hour I think of nothing, I go into a trance type state. I love feeling detoxed and energized. I love my instructor and his sincerity. I love that there is no success when you bring an inflated ego into the room. I love that I have seen this happen!
I tag Tay, Sunrise, Prixie, Louisa and Brazen
- Link to the person who tagged you.
- Write six random things about yourself.
- Post the rules on your blog.
- Tag people at the end of your post and link to them.
Tuesday, 09 December 2008
I also want to come back here, to this rather miserable looking blog (I am thinking about wordpress but it scares me) and write about the Champagne Festival!
It is good not to have a hangover!
Monday, 08 December 2008
You Should Be With an Earth Sign!
Your best match is a Taurus, Virgo, or Capricorn
Why? You like your guys to pamper, wine, and dine you
Not that you're a gold digger, you just like the finer things
An Earth Sign will go all out to woo you - and enjoy doing it
And you'll never find a more trustworthy or loyal match!
Well maybe I can sum it up with a some words:
*Champagne Champagne Champagne
*Moonbeam and Thumbelina
*Food - Lot's of delicious food: Salmon, Tuna, oysters, sorbet
*Lot's more swimming
*Feeling sexy and laughing my head off!
Friday, 05 December 2008
Where have you been my whole life?
I have discovered shops still making tie-dye dresses – I can’t believe it! Antique shops with thousands of gems to be discovered. Incense wafting in the streets, ice cold beers sitting on tiny wonky tables.
The Festival of Bubbles! It will be my third time and I am tremendously excited! A day in Franschhoek, sun, music, champagne, strawberries and a little white dress – perfection!
It has been a crazy week and I am so looking forward to this weekend!
Thursday, 04 December 2008
Beautiful little townhouse in a well run security complex. Very close to shopping malls and the highway. Perfect for a single female or male. There is 24 hour security, (which you need in Joburg!) Open plan lounge and kitchen with two bedrooms and one full bathroom. It has laminated floors throughout with a lovely small garden in the front, a covered patio and peaceful private garden at the back. Covered parking for two cars.
Tuesday, 02 December 2008
Monday, 01 December 2008
It was a lovely weekend. Being a somewhat shy and rather reserved person, having very sociable neighbors in Stellenbosch has been a very pleasant experience. I have also learnt what it means to truly Kuir – a marvelous Afrikaans word for socializing, getting together in a rather unorganized, casual, warm and seamless manner. Many discussions about pots and pans, where to buy the best produce, how to make curtains on the cheap and how much we hate noise on Saturday mornings. I also discovered a wonderful store –I was the only sorry ass female in the dark about this miracle place – Plastics for Africa. It is amazing – R8 for a plastic tub on a hook – I have no idea what I will use this wonderful perfectly pink plastic bucket for – but I just know it will come in handy!
The weekend was sadly ruined by a really bad haircut – my hairdresser is German and I think he misunderstood me when I carefully mentioned that I wanted to keep my hair long! I hate it – I look ridiculous with a head of a thousand curls. I am going to have to do maintenance in the mornings – irons and blow dryers and shit – I hate hair maintenance!
Okay Monday you can finish now.
Thursday, 27 November 2008
nostalgia [no-stal-juh, -jee-uh, nuh-]
–noun 1. a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one's life, to one's home or homeland, or to one's family and friends; a sentimental yearning for the happiness of a former place or time: a nostalgia for his college days.
2. something that elicits or displays nostalgia.
The B day balloons!
The loveliest place in Jozi!
Wednesday, 26 November 2008
There is so much to catch up on; this sickness has stolen some precious days from me – especially since I am starting to have so much fun in my life and so much fun in this city!
I just have time for two things:.
Damn the traffic department to hell!
LIVE TO THE POINT OF TEARS!
Thursday, 20 November 2008
Wednesday, 19 November 2008
It was AWESOME! As soon as I stepped off the plane, my immune system weakened in the wind and now I am horribly sick – I feel goofy and completely out of it!
I am really looking forward to this weekend so I can recover!
Friday, 14 November 2008
Wednesday, 12 November 2008
Six months pregnant, and she was walking out of shopping malls armed to the hilt with stolen goods and hitching a ride home. Sadly she died of an overdose nine years ago – but the cards were a gift from her and I can only believe that she stole them with the kindest of intentions, given her reality at that time! I can’t help but think of her when I think about the tarot, and the day she made me cut my finger so we could become blood sisters.
My first reading had a profound effect on me especially this card which seemed to be the dominant one at the time:
I hope that my hermit stage is coming to an end!
I contemplated getting another reading a while ago, but decided to go see a career psychologist instead – it was a huge massive waste of time and money. The old retired man asked me what I think I am good at and what would I like to do, I was like duh – not work! His advice was to get into something creative – he really dazzled me with his insight!
I like the idea of the cards as a guide; I am attracted to the idea that a picture can tell a thousand words. I don’t believe for one minute that there is anything sinister and evil in this fascination, that is the type of mentality as people thinking devil worshipers lurk around every corner! Ancient mystic arts can’t all be idealist foolishness – can they? It is probably the old goth in me…
*Life really can be full of surprises, from the physical beauty around us to the surprising kindheartedness of people.
*We can always hurt someone, often more than we realise.
*Not everyone is like me, what I deem correct and true is not necessary the same for others.
*People often mistake my passion for being stressful and intense.
*It is always easier being honest, once I have been lied to by someone, regardless how small and seemingly harmless their lie has been – my feelings towards them change forever.
*Fear is common in every human being and is often mistaken for selfishness or arrogance.
*Reading results in a massive subconscious accumulation of knowledge never fully realised but continuously appreciated in the strangest moments. Reading also allows for a much needed rest from reality and refreshes the imagination with possibility.
*Appearance is important. As much as I wish it weren’t true, how you present yourself is how you are judged, people are fast and lazy thinkers. The trick is to reflect your personality into your presentation and not appear superficial.
*There are people who say many things and do nothing. I quickly lose faith in those people.
*It is far more important to listen than to talk, as long as the other person has the same respect – because sometimes I need to be heard.
*I love being on my own, but it is far from the happiness I experience being surrounded by people who sincerely love me. There is also no greater loneliness than spending time with someone who regards your company as insignificant.
*You learn to love someone when you forgive all their faults.
*There is nothing unusual about wanting a fairytale. There are those who have found theirs on this mortal earth and I want mine.
*Hangovers will always ruin your day – unless you are happily in love and get to spend the day in bed with your lover who also likes bad TV.
*Turning thirty is not going to be the end of my world!
There are many more...maybe tomorrow
Tuesday, 11 November 2008
It is so windy – I fear leaving this building and taking flight! It has been a very long day and now I am looking forward to a lovely dinner with a friend, a bottle of wine and a good night’s sleep!
As long as I make to my car in one piece.
The answer my friend is blowin in the wind…
Monday, 10 November 2008
I am going to be in a state of mourning for the next four days! I know I am being silly, I know I am being dramatic – but hell I will get onto the cheerful balloon of denial and or acceptance once Elvis leaves the building. By Elvis I am of course referring to my twenties!
My rocking roaring, exciting, devastating, tragic and happy twenties. I am saying goodbye to the girl and begrudging saying an unenthusiastic hello to the women.
I will lament, I will be shamelessly bitchy, selfish and irrational. This is a space which allows me to be honest and the truth is I am not happy about turning thirty! I am horrified. Sure it is in the attitude, sure I am my own worst enemy. But flippin hell, I will be over the hill soon, the wrong side of the hill. It all goes downhill. I know it isn’t the same for everyone, from what I have seen and heard some people embrace their thirties like it’s a new pair of jeans, most women look more beautiful and happier and that’s cool– but I cannot go down gracefully – it just isn’t in me!
The man thinks it is hilarious, he of course crossed the hill some time ago and has made peace with it all. The devil in me has him directly in the firing line, the part he has played in my tragic fear of becoming old can never be underestimated! Last night I almost threw a steaming hot pie at him!
Well I must go get a facial – pampering has suddenly taken a more serious role of preservation!
Friday, 07 November 2008
Word for the week in my head...
Thought for the week in my head...
I am digging this job!
Thing for the week in my life...
GPS, I got soooo lost leaving town because I was trying to drive and read directions at the same time – it’s just not good enough – I need the real McCoy, someone to shout at me!
Song for the week in my head...
Every time someone says something about songs, off she goes again inside my head…or should I just keep chasing pavements…..I WANT TO SCREAM RIGHT NOW
Food for the week in my belly...
is absolute rubbish. I have been eating very little or utter crap. Today I had a cannoli for breakfast. (I really love saying that word,cannoli, cannoli, canolie. Seeing the word written is just not quite as powerful!)
Colour for the week in my life...
Black, always black, can't escape the black…
Smile for the week on my face...
I can’t fit under my desk – my legs are too long! It is hysterical!
Blessing for the week in my heart…
I am going home soon, to see my wonderful family and my gorgeous sweet dog! I really miss having a pet…
Okay - I am really not sure who has or hasn't done this - but I tag Sunrise, Rox, Po and Redframe (Who I will forgive not doing it because her big day is right round the corner!)
Here are the rules:
1. Link back to the meme creator (cathjenkin)
2. Link back to me
3. Share your random thoughts list
.4. Tag as many people as you like.
It was quite a weird feeling taking out my blog persona into the real world!
I have had a pretty impressive week and now I fear a pretty boring weekend!
Some of my weekend highlights will probably be
A couple bottles wine
Hopefully, should the sun shine and the pool remain vacant, a bit of tanning
Attempt #2: shopping for some colour
Lot’s of sleep and lots of planning – next week this time I shall be thirty in a different city
Thursday, 06 November 2008
1. Sunday Stealing’s McDanger Meme
What are your nicknames?
An old friend calls me Thumbelina – I can’t really remember why?
What TV gameshow or reality show would you like to be on?
What was the first movie you bought in VHS or DVD?
What is your favorite scent?
Ja’adore and Opium
If you had one million dollars to spend only on yourself, what would you spend it on?
An apartment facing the sea – although with a million it would probably have to be a like a one bedroom, little, tiny….hell a million really isn’t much these days is it? Okay then a black shiny little sports car! (well that’s if it is rands – with dollars; definitely the beachfront apartment!)
What is one place you’ve visited, can’t forget and want to go back to?
Do you trust easily?
Yes – I tend to be quite gullible, maybe in my thirties I will learn!
Do you generally think before you act, or act before you think?
Sometimes I over analyse too much and then I am frozen and do nothing
Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
Yes – being treated like a piece of furniture by the man who used to rock my world!
Do you have a good body image?
I don’t think so.
What is your favorite fruit?
What websites do you visit daily?
Blogs, Gumtree, I Google just about everything and go from there.
What have you been seriously addicted to lately?
The sun, my phone, Chardonnay, digestive biscuits and yoga
What’s the last song that got stuck in your head?
Something about chasing pavements
What is your favorite thing to wear?
Do you think Rice Krispies are yummy?
Yuk – no, but I do remember those ones with little marshmallows, that was pretty cool!
What would you do if you saw $100 lying on the ground?
Think that it is finally my lucky day!
What items couldn’t you go without during the day?
Phone, smokes, my car, handcream and sunglasses
What should you be doing right now?
———————2. Unconscious Mutterings Meme ———————
I say … and you think … ?
1. In love… what is love?
2. Be my guest… Fool
3. Number one… Must renew my driver’s license
4. Swallowed whole… Oysters
5. 50 percent… happy
6. Made in… heaven
7. Supplement… Vitamin C is very important for smokers
8. Right for… now, it is all about the attitude.
9. Endless… dreams
10. Ceramic… I really should have gone for those classes all those years ago, it was such a cool studio…I can only imagine what I could have made…
What a crazy week it has been! It has been impossible to sit and take stock and with the Joburg trip just around the corner, to do lists are being created in my dreams.
In this spirit of all being new and shiny I spent two hours clothes shopping yesterday with the steadfast determination of buying clothes with colour. It didn’t work! With the purchase of three additional little black numbers, Skip Black is now officially my most used laundry detergent
I am so happy Americans have finally come right – I was really doubtful it was going to happen, especially with their tendency to remain ignorantly happy. Out with the old and in with the new - all around -from my little microenvironment into the world beyond!
Monday, 03 November 2008
Tuesday, 28 October 2008
Oh well, I have just been forced to curb my spending for a week – thanks assholes!
Then your envy becomes a little demon in its own right, and ideas of quitting the rat race and investing in a beach hut and a beaded necklace business, suddenly seems like a highly plausible option!
Monday, 27 October 2008
Friday, 24 October 2008
Thursday, 23 October 2008
1x Tomato cut into small wedges
Woolies mixed leaf ready-washed salad leaves
Add reduced-fat woollies prawn cocktail at the very end!
I went to the Ambassador Hotel last night and we ate at Salt. It is incredibly beautiful and had the food not been as good as it was, I would have hardly noticed anything else besides the waves crashing immediately below us! It was superb!
My new phone arrived today – through a crisis of indecision I chose the Blackberry Curve. Only problem now is learning how the hell to use it. My guess is I will be pretty occupied for the next couple of days!
I am so looking forward to a beautiful sunny weekend!
Wednesday, 22 October 2008
I am visiting some people in Bantry Bay tonight and really looking forward to the excursion. I would actually do anything these days to break routine.
Had another early night last night, so today I am feeling pretty damn fantastic! The worst thing about going to bed early is I normally wake up at four in morning, exploding with a thousand ideas about my life. The ideas are so brilliant that I end up trying to write everything down, before I go back to bed. Yesterday morning I practically finished an entire power point presentation before 5am.
The termination documents are a constant pain in the ass. If I have to sign one more document or copy my hideous ID photo one more time I will scream!
This is one event I cannot wait for: The Whiskey Live Festival. 5th to 7th November. I have only been once before and loved it!
It is a fantastic opportunity to taste the best of the best, a wee dram of something completely unaffordable!
Come on Sunshine - nearly there!
Tuesday, 21 October 2008
It is cold and windy outside – but the perfect weather for yoga!
I haven’t been able to read a single blog, but intend to make up for it tonight.
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream―and not make dreams your master;
If you can think―and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings―nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And―which is more―you’ll be a Man, my son!
by Rudyard Kipling
What a wonderful Poem!
Monday, 20 October 2008
There has been many incredible things this man has brought into my life. He introduced me to the world of gardening; I had no idea the type of therapy there is in sinking your hands into the earth, planting seeds then watching them grow.
He inspired a confidence in me, that I could do anything I set my mind on doing. He was very encouraging and supportive. He also introduced me to an exciting, fulfilling and uninhibited sexual relationship, a world I had not known before. Then our reason for meeting in the first place: the world of food and wine. We have had the most amazing dinners in the most beautiful and respected venues. From fine dinning, to bistro – we have had evenings of great splendour. All these things deepened my love and appreciation for him and what we had together.
Back to the present state of affairs: Unfortunately, he does very little for me in the confidence department, I think the last compliment I received was “You look sunny” and the bedroom is about as eventful as mould on walls.
The hole in the wall we live in, does’t offer much opportunity to garden and finally Saturday night I acknowledged the death of our last shared passion. He had as much charisma as the bread roll on the table. I, as usual, overcompensated for the lack of conversation by turning into Susie chatterbox. All illusions of romance I still had went out the window, when presented with the bill, he split it! What I haven’t yet mentioned is that this was a dinner for our seven year anniversary. I was delighted he remembered I was thrilled he was taking me to a restaurant where I had wanted to go for ages; finally the guy was showing me he still cares. What the fuck – I paid half the bill! Seven years, seven is a bad number, it gives me the creeps.
Anyway Tokara’s food didn’t disappoint. The starters were very uninspiring and rather bland. But the main courses were lovely and the setting is just spectacular! Our table was awful. I just don’t know why you would seat two people at the top of your restaurant, facing the entrance and with their backs against the entire restaurant. They lost our booking, so we got the ass end table. Of course the man didn’t want to make a fuss, so I just had to sit through the irritation, clenching my jaw every now and then. I also don’t dare complain too much, because then he gives me this exasperated look, and I know all will not end well!
Well I need to keep my spirits up this week – its going to be a long one. I have much to do and organise and I am really starting to look forward to my JHB trip in a couple of week’s time.
I want to do a bit of a detox this week, get on the straight and narrow and devote my last remaining days of being twenty something to feeling good and healthy and excited for what the future may hold.
Thursday, 16 October 2008
I really need to drag my ass to yoga tonight.
It is probably due to the draining environment I have sit in for another eight more days, or the realisation that I will be starting a new job soon. (Why the hell didn’t I organise myself some time out???) Everything just seems so uncertain. So contrary to what I had planned and hoped for this October 2008. At home and at work. The distance between the two hasn’t been that easy lately. I left at seven last night, only to be stuck at the scene of a horrific accident on hospital bend. An up-side down car and thousands of flashing lights. And then there is the impending 30th birthday...Oh dear!
So yes – a wee bit of a rut.
Wednesday, 15 October 2008
I tried Samsung for a while, I still feel uneasy remembering how I struggled getting back into the Nokia vibe. Changing my cell phone has climaxed into one of the most important decisions I need to make. I love gadgetry, new inventions, and toys. If somehow a PlayStation found its way into my home, I think I would turn / expand into a very different person!
So now I have made the bold move to turn to Blackberry. The big question is The Pearl or The Curve? I dont need too many fancy things - I just need to love it!
First impression: I would love a phone called The Pearl – it is so sexy. It conjures up images of Pearl necklaces, lace and black velvet. The Curve – well that just sounds like that silly ‘women- only’ gym. Why on earth would you want to go to a gym when there are no men around? Men working hard, lifting weights, doing sit ups, bench presses ….I digress.
High level research findings: There is no 3G on either phone, which is slightly concerning. It looks like The Curve has better GPS functionality. The Pearl also has GPS but it looks like you have to register and pay a monthly amount to access this facility. The Curve is also bigger – with a bigger LCD screen.
I can’t seem to find out which one is newer – that plays a huge factor in the decision. When it comes to choosing a phone for two years – I believe in going large! My phone needs to be the cake, eat the cake and then bake another!
I will continue with the research! What a lovely distraction!
IT IS A BEAUTIFUL DAY
Thursday, 09 October 2008
The workplace has turned even nastier. There was one girl who I thought sweet, maybe even had potential for some great things – she disappointed me horribly. I am a loyal person, very possibly loyal to a fault and when people disappoint me and let me down, I am always shocked by my reaction. As hard as I try to cultivate a Fuck You attitude on my face, my adrenaline pumping heart always gives me away and shakes me to the core. Up until recently the accelerated heart beat accompanied a maddening rise of heat to my face; somehow I think I have managed to control this little outburst of horrors. But the heart, she just wont tow the line. Anyway it is a little reminder how things do work out in the end. I am leaving; I really don’t need to care.
It will be good if the sun shines this weekend. My legs are practically transparent.
Here’s to the almost end of a long, arduous week.
Monday, 06 October 2008
*Stop feeling so bloody sorry for yourself
*Study like a maniac tonight and pass the exam
*Don’t be disappointed if tomorrow is winter again
*Go to Yoga at least three times this week
*Go to bed early and wake up early; starting tonight
*Stop scowling at people who walk slowly
*Check your spelling
Then when I start to realise that I am actually feeling sad staying within this realm of reality I start to imagine bigger and more extravagant scenarios. Ridiculous things like winning a fully booked and staffed hotel in Italy and dinner with Prince William in Paris, followed by a couple of drinks with Slash in New York! Like publishing an award winning sexy masterpiece of literary genius, where I deconstruct the inner workings of a normal twenty year old female (Normal ; and what exactly is normal? Deconstruction at it’s finest!) I know – pure insanity – but it makes me smile!
The best dreams are those of falling in love. Being in love and feeling completely loved. Sometimes I could curse this silly, soppy, girly and pathetic side of myself, but it is what I want. So yes I spent many hours in and out of dreamland, and often I wished I didn't have to wake up!
'Dreaming permits each and everyone of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.'
Yesterday the distractions were endless. My complex was alive with pool side braai’s, tanning and cocktails. As hard as I tried, I could not focus on Industrial Marketing, (Which now takes it’s place right next to accounting as the most boring subjects I have ever had to endure!)
A glass of wine in the sun or shivering in the sun-less / love-less hole I sadly call home – mmnnn tough one!
So Sunday afternoon was just lovely, because I decided life is just too short and afternoons of sunshine have been too damn rare to waste. I also had a very interesting conversation with an extremely sexy man in tight black shorts!
Today I get the distinctive feeling that the only people working in the city are the cafe / restaurant owners, it is buzzing everywhere! It is such a gorgeous warm day!
Friday, 03 October 2008
This week has sapped every bit of energy right out of me.
The resignation, the emotional abuse, the late nights, the new indulgence of Whisky sours, the long drives home, all the highs and lows and to make matters worse no yoga! This weekend I have a very week resolve to immerse myself in books and stationary.
Right now I just want to sleep and dream. Dream about another world, another life another love!
Thank the heavens and the moon and the stars it is Friday!
Thursday, 02 October 2008
"Man is nothing else but that which he makes of himself. That is the first principle of existentialism."
Jean-Paul Sartre 1946
It is good to start thinking about this again. I feel as though my life has become smaller over the years and this man has had a detrimental effect on how I regard life and reality. It is good to start to feel free again, even though it is just formulating in my mind. I have to start somewhere. There is nothing I want to do more right now than to curl up in bed with a book – but tragically exams start again on Tuesday!
Tuesday, 30 September 2008
I was thrilled to read about one of 302's marvelous cocktail creations under my humble name and I intend to enjoy one of these tomorrow evening, on the wine farm, watching the sun setting! Thanks 302!
All is well. (We have a new Health Minister)
Monday, 29 September 2008
Again the skies are grey and the streets are wet, but my there is a wonderful feeling of sunshine and light knowing that my time here has a definitive end!
I am balancing hangover on top of hangover from a weekend celebrating to the max. Grocery shopping on Saturday was definitely the most unsuccessful shopping excursion ever made. In between buying the most ludicrous items one can imagine, I had to have a number of smoke breaks in-between item selection. It was like running a marathon!
There is much to do and many to torment!
I am in the mood for a devilish day!
Thursday, 25 September 2008
Politics - What fresh hell is this??
Word of the Day:
Voracity \vuh-RASS-uh-tee\ noun
: the quality or state of being ravenous or insatiable.
Most interesting Stats:
33 884,143 - abortions this year (not including abortions due to maternal health risks)(This actually increased to 33 884,730 - since I started on this post)
This site is mind blowing: Worldometers
Really bad night last night! He was horrible and cruel - apparently I got a taste of my own medicine. I wonder does this make him feel vindicated? He knew today was a big day for me - he knows I have been on an emotional rollarcoaster ride the last couple of days - I dont really know him anymore.
I dont want to write this stuff down, I am so tired!
Monday, 22 September 2008
Velocity Call Centre - I am afraid your guys are doing a very poor job of sounding even remotely authentic!!
It is a beautiful day today!!! Summer have you actually arrived???
High Absenteeism has created a lovely peaceful and tranquil environment in the workplace, and this weekend can only be described as 'rustig' which for an English girl is quite an unusual thing to say - it might be the upcoming "National Braai Day ' which I find myself incredibly excited to take part in!!
I know it is Monday - I might make myself sick reading this cheery post tomorrow.
Anyhoo...Here's to Sunshine, warmth, beaches and da mountains
Farewell Mr Mbeki - I don't know much, but I appreciated your dignity and words. I loved your smile and enthusiasm when our boys won! Farewell.
Friday, 19 September 2008
Thursday, 18 September 2008
Wednesday, 17 September 2008
Five Reasons Why I love South Africa
1. Our sense of humour
Sometimes we laugh at the silliest things, we make fun of each other and despite coming from a variety of different backgrounds, with diverse cultures, language and religions the average South African can easily crack a joke with a complete stranger!
2. Our sense of Justice
Very often I see the kindness and generosity of strangers assisting fellow South Africans. I have also witnessed the shared anger among people when someone, public or otherwise has been unfairly treated.
3. The humorous banter between cities
This was best encapsulated by the SAA ad. The Cape Tonian talking about the mountain and wine, The Joburg girl with her special brand of Sandton speak and the Durban surfer with his sunshine kissed blond hair.
4. Our adverts, the media
No one will ever forget the Vernon’s Koekemoers bombastic rise to fame based on a pair of shorts and a hairstyle – now embraced by Vodacom and Nandos.
The creation of the word ‘Snice’ thanks to KFC
The beautiful ad’s of Alan Gray and Investec and the thought provoking ads of Sasol.
There are many, many, more – I really think we can be proud of our advertising standards in this country.
Then there is our weird take on celebrities in this country – we just don’t stand for kissing ass if you are a celebrity. We do respect and offer our praise and support, but expect too much and think for one minute than you are better than the rest of us and we will be pissed! – It is so un-American and I love it!
5. The almost unbelievable natural Beauty
‘ I owe my being to the hills and the valleys, the mountains and the glades, the rivers, the deserts, the trees, the flowers, the seas and the ever-changing seasons that define the face of our native land.’
An excerpt from ‘I am an African’
“Are you sure?”
Three R5 rand coins and ten minutes later, after the empty handed trek back to my desk.
“It didn't take the R5 coins.”
“Oh – because usually what I do is use the coke machine downstairs with my R5 coin then cancel my order and use the change upstairs!”
“Can I quickly use your PC? My laptop is crashing and I need to finish a report in two seconds” “No Problem.”
Proceeds to get up and locks PC.
“I‘ll be back now.”
Returns half an hour later.
“Oh, but I thought when you pushed Ctrl + Alt + Delete, it won’t really lock the PC – does it really lock it? Hey guys? Does it lock it…..?”
Friday, 12 September 2008
Hello Friday – freedom and cocktails. Please don’t let me down! I don’t ask for much – but a sexual encounter would be nice. Or maybe if I could stumble upon a bit of money – somehow, or a free car perhaps?
I could actually be very much satisfied if the sun continues to shine. You need to remember you foolish girl – it’s the little things that count!!
Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs;
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals;
and everywhere life is full of heroism.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.
Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Strive to be happy.
Max Ehrmann, Desiderata
Thursday, 11 September 2008
I am sitting outside, sipping on a martini. The sun is shinning and my hair is behaving. Suddenly the cutest boy with the most amazing smile is kneeling in front of me.
"Hi - I am not sure if you remember me but I am in your yoga class, I have always wanted to talk to you and now here you are! You must let me buy you a drink"
Of course I recognised him - how do you forget such a perfect male body in tight black hot pants- holding the warrior pose like a God of war and pride, of course I recognised the man who had the sign of the Scorpio tattooed on his shoulder-the most beautiful shoulders I have ever seen, and those arms...those hands...now touching mine - softly almost shyly.
Dream Dream Dream!
Wednesday, 10 September 2008
Thank goodness today's office hell is at an end and finally it is warm outside!
Finally the sun is shining, albeit a rather chilly shine – it is very painful to think of the people up in Jozi wearing t-shirts and open toed shoes – my God they are probably even swimming!
Okay enough with the dwelling on what’s lacking, time for the inverse:
1. A truly wonderful and diverse family – I can swear in Lebanese, German and Greek
2. A lovely pair of Swarovski earrings from Dubai
3. A beautiful antique treasure chest which holds all my love letters and journals and the silliest things like an old cigarette box with my ex-boyfriends phone number and old till slips from nightclubs in London.
4. A collection of the most beautiful bottles of Champagne gathering dust – I will not touch them in my twenties!
5. I am still in my twenties
6. I am very happy with the effects yoga has had on my backside – it is quite remarkable - I may even splurge and get myself a sexy new bikini this summer.
7. I love reading and will always be grateful for the love of books instilled in me from a very young age – Thanks Mom
8. I can sms, do my make up and have a cup of tea sitting in traffic.
9. I am very good at rearranging furniture
10. I am a fantastic procrastinator!
Tuesday, 09 September 2008
I am tired today. I need sleep and bedtime is far away,
I am lacking in certain areas
Okaaay. My stuff really needs to get sorted. I have procrastinated the day away and read everything I could type my way into, in-between cigarette breaks. I am tired and along with my severe lack of gusto I am also concerned about the lack of other bits in my life – Like:
1. A Tan
3.A guilt free relationship with SARS
4.Order and perfection in the home environment
5.Patience for the general population and their big ass heavy feet that cannot seem to move as fast as their mouths
8.My side rear view mirror
9.A well stocked fridge with healthy food and good liquor
10.My ability to be easy breezy and smile to all and sundry
11.Sleep – my bed – so far away
13.Discipline – You are not paid to blog all day women!
This list has just made everything worse – I need some dark chocolate!
I think I may skip the yoga today – I think I might buy myself a bottle of Grouse and necessities. Eat chocolate and spring clean my cupboards! Yes I think that is the solution.
But I have just acquired a lovely word in my in-box
circumlocution \ser-kum-loh-KYOO-shun\ noun
*1 : the use of an unnecessarily large number of words to express an idea
2 : evasion in speech
And there is a mere 72 hours until Friday 14H00
Monday, 08 September 2008
It was a lovely weekend of wine tasting and ending with large amount of grappa in front of a fire. I love fires; I can stand for hours and hours just staring at fire. Unfortunately I have arrived at work with the fresh memory of fire still lingering on my clothes and in my hair – oh well!
I am so sad that my adventure into Cape Town didn’t work out the way I had planned. I really believed that I would have been married by now – at the very least engaged and planning my engagement party. I thought we would be spending our first Christmas together as a family in our own home. I think what has shocked me the most and even surprised me is how much this man has hurt me and let me down. Despite everything we went through It just blew my mind that he could treat me so carelessly. It is a very bitter pill to swallow. – I feel so foolish and sick at the mere mention of someone else’s dreams coming true. There is an empty gapping whole in the pit of my stomach. It is hard to step back and look objectively at the situation. It is hard to not feel stupid for allowing myself to get so hurt and for having so many dreams. To really love someone – to plan my future with them – okay you can have me – only to get it thrown back in your face. To have your every fault blown up and presented to you on an ugly humiliating platter of guilt, blame and selfishness. What meant the world to me; he brushed off as dust. I find myself staring at him wondering when the man who loved me will come back. I stare at myself in the mirror and wonder if the girl he loved will ever come back. Who knew I was so tragically romantic?
Thursday, 04 September 2008
1. What’s worse - Physical or Mental cheating?
I would have to say Physical – sometimes people’s thoughts go to places they shouldn’t.
2. Is it easier to forgive or forget?
I hardly ever forgive and forget, unless I can totally understand the situation
3. Can men and women be ” Just Friends?”
Yes - eventually – my best and closest friends are men
4. Dating co-workers?
Definitely not a good idea – I think it’s better if people at work don’t know too much about you
5. All expenses paid vacation to anywhere?
6. On the way to the electric chair - What’s your last meal?
Oysters, Champagne, a freshly baked white bread with butter ham and cheese. Chocolate mouse and a King Cone
7. Water parks are…?
Where that rave type thing happens in Boksburg?
8. When you are “In Love” do you notice other people?
9. Is flirting cheating?
No – as long as it isn’t my man flirting
10. Would you rather have 1 great friend or 5 pals?
1 great friend.
11. If someone called you a bitch would you be offended?
No – ‘When I am praised I am humbled but when I am abused I know I have touched the stars’ Oscar Wilde
12. Are you ok with your significant other being friends with an ex?
Not until I get to know her and see for myself what the dynamics between the two of them are like.
13. Would you live with someone without marrying them?
I didn’t want to – but did.
14. Favorite sport?
15. Is toilet paper hung over or under?
16. Do you squeeze toothpaste from the middle or end of the tube?
I really do try for the end.
17. How do you feel about tanning booths?
In SA - Why? We have sun and beaches...
18. Friends with benefits?
Would love to try it.
19. Do you believe in angels?
20. Would you rather take pictures or be in pictures?
Take – I am not one iota photogenic
21. Have you ever flirted with someone you had no interest in?
Yes and the aftermath made me terribly regretful and guilty!
22. Ever kissed a random person and then walked away?
1996 New Years Eve White Horse Inn – I kissed many strangers
23. Would you buy bootleg merchandise?
No – the sellers scare me
24. What color looks best on you?
Black, red and white
25. If you could play any sport professionally what would it be?
26. Ever break up with someone and regret it?
Yes – He was so intellectual, sweet and sexy and I was a stupid young girl obsessed with finding a guy with a Mohawk.
27. Are you a jealous person?
28. Would you ever have plastic surgery?
Maybe when I am older and stuff has turned south
29. When do you want to get married?
I thought I wanted to be married now – but I am not so sure anymore
30. Who has the sexiest accents?
31. Next concert you’re attending?
Nothing in the pipeline
32. Favorite song?
There is no possible way I can answer that – it would turn into an essay
33. Favorite movie?
34. What’s your occupation?
Too boring to mention
35. What’s your sign?
The sexiest sign - Scorpio.
36. Are you a beach, country or city person?
Beach – I flippin love the sea.
37. Best vacation spot you’ve been to?
Umhlanga Durban for two weeks in a penthouse apartment.
38. Have you ever had a “secret affair?”
Yes – it was thrilling
39. If you could own a non-traditional pet which would it be?
40. Favorite show as a child?
41. Where do you spend most of your money?
Booze, petrol and ciggarettes
42. Are you currently working at a job that you hate?
43. Have you ever been so heart broken that you called in sick to work?
44. Favorite summer drink?
45. Can you change a car tire?
Yes – I think so – but have yet been put to the test and I really love watching men doing car things with machinery
46. Favorite cologne / perfume?
47. Favorite candle scent?
48. Would you consider yourself adventurous?
49. What is your My Space profile song?
I really hate My Space
50. Favourite concert attended?
5 5fm concert many moons ago with Tracy Chaplin, Midnight Oil (i think?) and Sting. (My word I remember having dreadlocks that day)
51. Would you date an already attached man / woman?
No – I have been at the other end and would never want to cause someone so much pain
52. Would you sing Karaoke in front of co-workers?
Absolutely not (Unless it was like a group effort thing involving lot’s of drinks).
53. Can you shoot pool?
I suck at pool, even though I have played a thousand games and actually really enjoy it
54. Do you like your siblings’ significant others?
55. Can you drive a stick?
56. Did you wear white at your wedding?
57. Have you ever sat and hoped for a phone call?
58. Ever skip school and spend the day at the beach?
No Beach; skipped school to do pretty pointless things.
59. Favorite TV show?
60. What do you think about gay marriage?
62. What are you waiting for at the movies?
Something good to show
63. What is your favourite holiday?
64. Describe your fighting style: drunken master or angry monkey?
Only ears now but I have had: nose, belly, ears, eyebrow, tongue and my favourite was my lip.
One day soon
67. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?
68. Thongs? yes or no.
Yes – too many I fear VPL
69. Write 2 truths and 1 lie
I really enjoyed doing this.
I have a terrible dislike of many symmetrical dots in one space.
I work in a beautiful office building with lots of plants and inspirational, good looking people.
3x Champagne cocktails
1x can’t remember name but it was orange and contained brandy
2x Glass’s White
2x Glass’s red (Meerlust – couldn’t say no)
= Very difficult to type right now – feeling oddly elated. Must look like hell.
Got a speeding fine – must remember to not drive like a maniac after drinking. Silly girl!
I have no idea how I am going to get through the day. I think I need a coffee and something greasy, followed by Vitamin C, more make up and a long ‘staring at nothing’ session.
Wednesday, 03 September 2008
A young girl, wallowing in a pit of contradictions, finding temporary relief in chemicals and self-help books!
I would be inclined to feel sympathy, yet her words have caused great hurt to those I love. She loves to talk; she loves to throw her words around; carelessly.
I believe in Karma and be warned, because when someone humiliates you the same way you humiliated him; I doubt you’ll see it coming. A word of advice; use it / don’t use it: Chill the Fuck out on your empty words. They are no substitute for being a real genuine and sincere person – no matter how dazzling you think your words may be!
Tuesday, 02 September 2008
So I am sitting here looking somewhat like a frigid librarian – the safe choice – a totally sexless collared shirt, generic blazer, and hair in bun, Yawn, boring, boring – no one would ever guess the shit going on inside my head.
YAY Expensive Mistakes and Cheap Thrills recommended my little blog. Ha Ha – murder on the Dance Floor – not quite what I was going for – but hell it’s mine!
Monday, 01 September 2008
I arrived home, my car heavy with all my belongings – all I owned or needed in the trunk of my car. He saw me arrive through the window – he watched as I got out the car and began unpacking – maybe he wanted confirmation that I had indeed come home. He held the door open for me as I walked in dragging bags and blankets, shoes and bags of sea shells. He smiled and said ‘Welcome back home baby!”
I called him from the car park – I hadn’t planned on arriving so late and the lights were out – with a horrible pang of regret, It dawned on me that he might be asleep – I wouldn’t be able to get in – eleven at night and no where to sleep. So I called him. He sounded grumpy when he asked me what I meant by: I am home? I asked him to help me with my bags, a while later he sauntered down the stairs, took some bags off my shoulders – made a couple of remarks along the lines of: What the hell do you have in here?”
Eventually the torture was over – my bags lay strewn all over the flat. I poured myself a glass of wine – suddenly feeing very awkward and cold. He smiled and being a man of very few words sighed “Oh Well…” Then he went to bed. I fell asleep / passed out on the couch and woke up at about three in the morning. It was freezing, it was hell. I went to bed and lying beside him I burst into tears. He didn’t wake up.
Wednesday, 27 August 2008
Tuesday, 26 August 2008
There is smoke coming off the top of my head – I am like a well oiled machine today. All work and no play. The headphones are on and my face is set to ‘do not disturb or you will die’
I have cleaned my desk and ruthlessly attacked my stationary drawer. Nothing will prevent me from completing my to do list. Bring on the drivel and the pettiness because you haven’t seen anything yet!
I just received an email request – it’s a one liner – a beaut!
“Note I are wanting our weekend report with late inclusive.” ?????@@#3$$%^^
I are wanting to clap you wiff the back of my foot!
Thursday, 21 August 2008
I know I can no longer sit on my backside, I also know that this is my chance. I can no longer allow myself to be subdued into thinking that the clogs turn as they should and I am but a babe in the arms of destiny. No. Time for some energy and action.
It can be so frightening!
Wednesday, 20 August 2008
Having such a sober evening meant of course that I was wide awake at 4am this morning missing my man terribly! I finished Past Mortem by Ben Elton and unfortunately I found the ending somewhat predictable, it was a bit too Hollywood. I have no idea what I am going to read next!
There was the most amazing mist in the city this morning. I almost don’t want summer to come too quickly, the last couple of days have been so awesome. I am nervous of the arrival of holiday makers and tourists and even more congestion on the roads – but I am looking forward to the sun setting at eight!
After work plans; the ultimate goal: distraction and healthy living.
Yoga. Clean flat. Dinner of corn on the cob with the tiniest pinch of butter and garlic salt, followed by provita’s hummus and cucumber.
TV: nothing – why is Wednesday night the worst TV night??
The most irritating moment: the sound of the dude eating crisps and opening a can of coke first thing in the morning – like even before I have even had my first cup of tea. I really don’t like to hear people chewing and slurping: Yuk! Good grief what a classy joint!
Tuesday, 19 August 2008
It was heavenly and now I am back at work.
The weather was gorgeous and now I am back at work.
Every night a different restaurant, a different cocktail – delight in Cape Towns winter specials and now I am back at work.
Walks along the beach, I finished two books and now I am very sadly back at work!
I must get my head right – A major detox is forthcoming. I am feeling very anxious and dark in the aftermath of my indulgence.
Sunrise you are soooo right;
“I know now that drinking has a massive effect on me, for days afterwards I feel like a perpetual cloud hangs over me. When I don’t drink, I have huge pep, zest and go around feeling all happy go lucky. When I tear it up, I am shattered for days; I think its time to moderate that shizness...”
So that's what I intend to do - to moderate the shizness ;-)
Right now this job is just not doing it for me.
I have just started reading Ben Elton: Past Mortem
It contains one of the most disturbing sex scenes I have ever read and truly horrific murders. Nothing beats a good old fashioned crime novel with sex and booze! The man is brilliant.
Tuesday, 12 August 2008
I guess it will come down to list making. Pros and cons. Divided into sections of Financial, career development, parking, benefits, technology and bathroom facilities. Where idealism fails – logic must take her place!
I am going on leave tomorrow – for four happy, happy days. Late nights and late mornings!
Friday, 08 August 2008
Friday – yay, yay, yay!
I have no idea what I am going to do – I have so successfully blocked visualising the future that I am incapable of making any kind of plans. I normally panic that one minute will go by unnoticed and under-utilised; but that is the old me: the new me is waiting to see what will unfold. Enjoying the moment – chillin’
Last night I sat at the bar of a very fancy restaurant – all on my ace. At some point I started to feel a bit like a first class hooker, I am either a sad weirdo or I have balls of steel – because it is not the easiest thing to do – eating alone in a posh restaurant! I am however determined to claw back my independence at any cost! Including the cost of over tipping because the bartenders took such good care of me! I loved them last night, like they were my own personal guardian angels!! I had sushi and skipped home – it was good!
Somehow – someway I managed to have a very productive week. I almost managed a handstand in yoga and I avoided spending a fortune at Kauai!
Now If only I could hear that song again…